Archive | November, 2013

The time my husband was like… do you really want to start obliging gender stereotypes in this relationship?

27 Nov

And I said, no.

The other day I said to my husband, go do (insert something) in the yard.

And he was like no.

And I was like, you’re the man, go do it (which is against everything I believe in but I said it).

And he was like, do you really want to start going by gender stereotypes in this relationship?

And I was desperately like, NO. Because holy hell if we did that I’d be screwed.

Kinley Baker/Kinley Cade


Let’s get serious about football fandom and being a female

25 Nov

Okay, so those of you who don’t know, I absorb a lot about football. And I mean absorb because most of it is passive. We watch football all day on Saturdays and Sundays. Honestly, most of the time I am doing that while also writing, reading, or catching up on shows.

So it’s not like I’m the hugest football fan in the world. I will never claim to be the hugest fan of anything because I’m usually distracted, which takes away from the fandom.

I’m lost in other worlds and/or zoning out.

We have season tickets to the college team my husband loves and we flew to St. Louis to watch the Seahawks play on Monday Night Football. We’ve gone to a few games and had a conversation about possibly moving into the apartments they are building across from the stadium.

So yes, I am mainly a fan of football because of my husband. I’m not sure if I would listen to so much sports talk radio or watch as much NFL network without him (that doesn’t take away from the fact I enjoy doing both).

On the other side, football is a perfect match to my personality. I don’t like most female endeavors and that often leaves me feeling like a failure.

I don’t understand shopping or the appeal of shoes (other than their efficiency in a zombie apocalypse), but I do understand the thrill of a good hit and the high of a roaring stadium.

(You can like shopping and football, I’m not saying you can’t. So please don’t take that away from that comment. It’s just a societal view of what women enjoy doing and I’m using it as an example because I’ve never understood the appeal of shopping.)

I like to talk (what the world sees as) guy stuff because it comes natural as opposed to when I talk female (what the world sees as) it’s mainly me feeling like I’m trying to catch up and/or care at all.

It’s a weird place to be. But I’ve been living this football interested life for a few years.

And I’m starting to get ticked off.

I’m starting to listen to guys talk football and they have no idea what they’re talking about.

I’m starting to listen to guys talk sports and one guy (from Seattle) even said he didn’t know Griffey came back to Seattle to end his career. If I know more about baseball than you do, you know nothing about baseball.

(Come on, man!)

I’m starting to realize that a lot of people pretend they follow football and they don’t.

One time in an elevator at my day job a man was talking about the Texas college game and I randomly said, I watched that game (on accident but I did watch the game) and I had more to contribute to the conversation than the other guy he was originally addressing.

Yet, I’m a girl. So I constantly live on the edge of losing my sports street cred.

An example is Alex Smith.

I know his whole story. Probably because I dislike the 49ers (Sorry! SEAHAWKS.). But I know his story.

Yet I listen to guys say, doesn’t he play for the Browns?

I’m thinking, no you idiot. He played for the 49ers and did just fine. He got injured and the new guy came along and replaced him. And now the new guy isn’t even having a very good season. And Kansas City (the actual place where Mr. Smith plays) is doing awesome (except they lost yesterday—thanks for lessening the effectiveness of my argument). SO whatever.

And that is my nice girl way of explaining it because I’m a girl and I’m nice (except for the idiot comment).

Anyway, so I’m in the ring with guys who don’t know what they’re talking about. Yet, if I say ONE THING that isn’t correct, the guy I’m talking to writes me off.

If I can’t come up with the name, or I say a guy isn’t that good and the other person thinks I’m crazy for that view, I lose their football attention.

They no longer want to talk sports with me.

It’s a really complicated position to be in. And I just wanted to put it out into the universe.

I like football. I’m a fan. I’m a female. And I probably know more about Matt Flynn than you.

Seahawks, Football, Female Fandom, Kinley Baker, Kinley Cade, Romance Author, Sports Romance

Kinley Baker/Kinley Cade

Ten things I might do simply because I’m an author

22 Nov

1.) I stare. I stare too long to the point people get uncomfortable and/or they think I’m coming on to them. I’m not coming on to you, I just stare. I stare. I think of world problems. Then I write books about them.

2.) If I know you in real life there’s a good chance I’ve already plotted how to ruin your life. Not because I’m a bad person. Not because I want your life to be ruined. But because I ruin character’s lives for a living. Just remember. I know how.

3.) I cry at allegories because they’re so good. Probably no explanation for that one, it’s just weird.

4.) I assume I have the ability to delete people. Like, you there, sir, annoying person? I don’t like you. I delete you. From reality. It has yet to work.

5.) I think I have the ability to rewrite everything. If I don’t like a real life scene, I’m thinking backspace, for sure. When I tell everyone to stop and start over again, people look at me strangely. I just yell, bend to my will!

6.) Point of views are living, breathing things that have feelings and I must consider them all. I usually understand them, then I see the other side and I agree even though I don’t want to. I don’t like it. It just makes me the person who can’t pick a side. A constant stander on the fence. Who just stands on fences all day? Not even cowboys. Get it, because they mend fences?

7.) I tell jokes that aren’t funny because I think they’re clever. Then no one laughs.

8.) I’m a user. I use everyone for material, even if I don’t mean to. Even the guy who asked me if I could look in his ear to see if it was infected—no I’m not a doctor. No, I didn’t look. This showed up in a story and if that can, anything can. You’ve been warned.

9.) Sometimes I imagine how a conversation will go and where I want it to end. Then I do my best to chart the course to get there. Like a pirate.

10.) Sometimes I really think I’m a pirate. Or a vampire. Or a kick-ass spy. Anything much, much cooler than I am because when your characters are eighty times cooler than you, why wouldn’t you want to be them?

And lastly, here’s an extra one.

11.) Because of all these things, and being an author, I almost feel like I need to warn people about me. Like hey, I do these things. These very bad things. I’ve been a bad girl… But then people will think I’m coming on to them again.

This person sounds terrifying. You probably don’t want to be that girl’s friend.

She stares. She cries. She knows.

But you can’t say she didn’t warn.

She also promotes cool things motivated by self-interest. And contests. Look at this amazing map Kat Latham created:

Join in the fun!

Kinley Baker/Kinley Cade

When I thought someone was dumb and I acted dumber

13 Nov

I recently realized it’s very easy to feel morally superior when you run into someone doing something really dumb.

In your head, it’s like. Oh my gosh. Look at that person. They are making a fooool of themselves. Yes, they are.

Dang. Look at all these people staring.

What. A. Loser.

Of course I didn’t say any of this out loud, so I’m still a decent person, right? Right?!

I guess I’m not afraid to admit that while I would never say anything specific to the person, or about it to anyone except for my husband and maybe my mother, I did think these things.

I was in a place and I made these judgments.

Then, later on, I did something equally dumb. Probably dumber.

You realize you are that person. The one everyone is staring at and calling an idiot.

Suddenly you start to feel bad.

Wow. I was really mean to that person in my head the other day. And look at me? It’s lonely when you’re making an epic jerk of yourself.

It’s important for me to remember this. If I think someone is doing something stupid. I better be nice to them, even in my head!

Because it will happen to me. Most of us do the best we can.

We still fight our human natures. We’re programmed to do dumb things.

If we can just give everyone a little breathing room when we’re making perfectly excellent decisions, the world might be a little less negative.

My father always tells me he’s proud of me. I always respond back, “Hey now. Slow down. There’s still plenty of time to make you un-proud.”

We’re going to make mistakes and have regrets. All we can do is the best we can.

Some of you will do better than others and I will be jealous.

Because I’m a pro at dwelling on mistakes.

And even though this post makes me a very flawed person, if you haven’t heard I’ll be writing contemporary romance as Kinley Cade. So if you don’t mind following me at or liking at, I’ll be your friend.

Agent news, new release news, and lots of use of the word “new”!

6 Nov

I am thrilled to announce I’m now represented by Sarah E. Younger with the Nancy Yost Literary Agency!!!

In mid-October I attended the Emerald City Writers’ Conference in the Pacific Northwest. This was my fourth year attending, and I’ve loved it every year. This year was especially exciting! I met several people I’ve been talking to for years online.

It’s always funny when people hold up their name badges and my first response is, I know you! Then they want me to hold up my badge, and yes! They know me.

This is such a great community, and putting faces to names is fantastic.

All the while I was meeting these people I was also a tad giddy for the second half of the conference.

Friday afternoon I suddenly realized I didn’t have pitches written for my Saturday morning appointments. Having spent days, months, weeks in the past putting together pitches, this realization was slightly horrifying. I was honestly just going to turn in my pitch appointments to the coordinators because in previous years other people have been able to use the appointments.

I was in a strange place. I had a book two for my contemporary series, a category paranormal romance and a fantasy romance.

For several hours I agonized over what I would do. Would I just sit down and say, “Here’s what I’ve got! What do you want to hear?”

Which made me sound a little frightening, right? I mean we all know the line between enthusiastic and terrifying is precarious at best.

Even up to the minute, I had no idea what I was going to do. In the past I’d been in groups of ten people. I didn’t want to waste other pitchers’ time because I hate doing that. Everyone spends hours preparing for those precious ninety seconds.

I ended up writing the pitches though and I was pleasantly surprised that my pitch writing skills have drastically improved since the first conference. Who knew we were learning this stuff while we agonize over rejections and what path to take next on our publishing journies?

I met with Sarah Younger, which ended up being a ten minute solo appointment. I don’t really remember all the specifics. It was something about football, then romance novels, then positive-ness.

It was a great conversation! I’ve had good pitch appointments but this one felt like we were really on the same page.

I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching the last year and Sarah really seemed to get where I wanted to go, or where I was trying to go.

I sent her several requested attachments and I tried to sit quietly and not get too excited.

Four years of actively seeking publication makes you intimately familiar with rejection. By this point you also realize why people are rejected, the value of rejection, and you know that every decision leads you one way or another.

Not only do you know rejection, you appreciate rejection. Which makes it all so much worse. It goes something like: You know this is for your own good… Yes, but it still isn’t any fun.

We spoke for a long time on the phone about a few of my current projects and she said encouraging things like “I think you might need to rewrite the last 1/3.”

Internally I was like, “Really?! I get to keep two thirds?” I was thinking I’d have to rewrite the whole thing.


Sarah had insightful feedback that really resonated with me. With her feedback I saw potential in things I’d given up on. I saw a direction I’d been trying for a year to steer toward but couldn’t quite manage on my own.

This is where the news comes in.

I will be writing contemporary romance as Kinley Cade!

Here is my info:


Don’t worry about not being able to find me. I will be keeping this blog (and address) for both names. It’s now “Kinley’s Blog” to keep it a central meeting place. You might notice at the top I have both names and the genre each name is focused on.

This will be built out as everything moves along. But anything you need to know for either name will be under the prospective tab. On the blog I’ll still be blogging about things like the perplexity of adulthood, etc.

I’ll also still be on Twitter as @KinleyBaker.

If you’re new today, welcome! Please scroll through previous posts and you’ll get the idea (hopefully). Feel free to visit again. This blog is very low key and friendly with promo only surrounding releases (And today because I’m having trouble controlling my enthusiasm).

With that said, here is the cover reveal for Kissing Her Scrooge! My first book on my new contemporary path.

Kissing Her Scrooge, Holiday Novella, Holiday Romance, Romance Author, Kinley Cade, Author Kinley Cade, Winter, Wonderland, Loving Couple, Scrooge, Tree Farmer


Every Christmas, Hannah Jones makes it her mission to give her hometown the perfect pageant. Even malfunctioning inflatable Santas and lost students can’t stop the self-proclaimed Miss Holiday. But the teacher may have met her mismatch in sexy but antisocial tree farmer Griff Green. Hannah’s been lusting after her new neighbor for months—and she’s determined to melt his heart by being naughty as well as nice…

He may sell trees, but Griff doesn’t do Christmas. He’s known as the town humbug—and he likes it that way. Which is why he’s been avoiding Hannah, despite the sexy visions of her that have been dancing through his head. When a surprise visit leads to a passionate kiss, he can’t deny the attraction any longer.

When Hannah discovers Griff isn’t the Scrooge he pretends to be—and she exposes his secret to the whole town—it may take a holiday miracle for their budding relationship to survive into the new year.

This is up for pre-order now HERE! It releases December 5, 2013 from Carina Press.

And it’s on Goodreads if you want to mark it to remember later HERE.

Next week I will have more info on the anthology this holiday story is a part of. I get to be part of this with two amazing additional novellas. The authors are wonderful ladies, too, which makes it better.

I want to take the opportunity to extend a huge thank you to the Carina Press team. Angela James and the Carina team have been amazing. I’ve been talking to other Carina Press authors and they’ve all had similarly great things to say. I’m always hesitant to recommend paths when people ask me because everyone’s experience is so different. But Carina has been consistently supportive and dedicated to producing the highest quality books.

You should read their books. I’ve enjoyed the last ten I’ve read.

The past few weeks have been crazy, the past year even crazier. I have no idea what the future will hold. But it’s exciting and there’s a certain level of relief in knowing I have a plan and someone else sees the potential in it.

I’ll try not to dole out too much advice because I still have so much to learn. But like with the pitches I wrote, sometimes we don’t realize how much we know about something until we start talking. I think I’m a little guilty of holding information close because I’m so afraid I’ll be wrong and someone will read a blog post in ten years and point to it and call me out.

I suppose we can’t live our lives that way. That’s one tough thing about the internet. It lives forever. If you’re unlucky enough to trip and fall and have someone catch it on camera, YouTube is your enemy.

In truth, we all have those dumb moments. We’re all guilty of being human. Which is what makes life so interesting. I hope to write more contemporary fiction based on characters experiencing those dumb moments. So we can laugh at them. Ahem. Just kidding. Kind of.

Thank you to everyone who ever supported me or said a kind word. I hope to have more fun news to share. I hope you’re all secretly sitting on amazing news you’re not quite ready share yet, too. 🙂

I’ve decided publishing is basically a ton of people sitting on exciting, secret news. So we all go talk on twitter to talk to other people who understand what we’re going through. We can’t say what we want to say, so we say other covert things.

This was an epic blog post (they’re usually much shorter), but thanks for reading until the end.

I hope whatever information I provide will help you in some way no matter where you are on your journey. Or what path you’re traveling. Or where you hope to end up.