Archive | December, 2013

I feel like a space creature at the grocery store

16 Dec

My humor is self-deprecating, right? I never really know how to define my humor. Just that it edges toward wry and most people don’t laugh at it.

But this weekend, I did something ridiculous even for someone who usually blogs about being ridiculous.

I went to the grocery store alone. It has been a while since this has happened. We usually stop on our way home from work or my husband goes.

He is the one who cooks, after all. I’m just the person who microwaves frozen things.

But being at the grocery store made me feel weird. I was awkward and out of place and how do I pick out vegetables again?

Somehow I managed to get organic cabbage instead of lettuce. Rookie mistake. They look the same!

tomato, grocery stores, writing, kinely baker, kinley cade, space creatures, aliens, space, normalcy, weird

The wrong kind of tomato…

It was such a defining moment in my life. I’m standing in my pajamas, in the middle of the store, and the thought suddenly hit me: I feel like another species.

Look at all these people functioning normally. I bet they aren’t intimidated by buying eggs.

When you think about it, eggs are a huge responsibility. What if you get a carton with a broken egg? Surely this is a grave supermarket sin.

Every now and then I have these moments where it hits me. I am not normal. The way I view the world is strange and out of sync with normalcy.

My ways have evolved out of being different and telling other people my quirks leads to pauses and raised brows. Nothing lewd or unseemly (I promise) but simple things like, I never go to the grocery store alone. Or… I don’t drive.

Then I wonder if the world is the way it is because everyone has settled the rules. Perhaps this is the place of comfort. The place of balance.

And if that is so, does that mean normal people don’t sit around contemplating the social construction of society, analyzing the bounds of humanity and what it truly means to live.

If so, sometimes I wonder if I’d rather be normal. I’d rather not feel like an otherworldly creature. It’s disconcerting.

Everyone knows the secret. I’ve always loathed secrets.

Perhaps I will retain a secret, as well. The secret of what it means to be strange.

***

Kissing Her Scrooge is newly out on December 3, 2013. It’s a contemporary romance holiday novella, so no space creatures. Or characters who feel like space creatures. Although I imagine perhaps each Griff and Hannah have felt misunderstood. You’ll have to read and find out.

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Love for holiday romances, a revelation about vampire mythology, the release of Kissing Her Scrooge and EXCERPT!

5 Dec

IT’S RELEASE DAY!

I absolutely adore holiday romances. Movies, books, plays, musicals, I love them all!

The Hallmark Channel is my best friend during the season.

When Angela James put out a call I knew I had to try my hand at contemporary, something I’d told myself I’d never be able to write. Never say never. In my mind I always thought, you are way too detached from reality to write something set in the real world.

Ha.

Well, I surprised myself and ended up writing a new-to-town, sexy loner who doesn’t celebrate the season. Griff has nothing in common with Hannah, the town’s holiday pageant president. Or does he?

I’m really hoping you like it because it was a blast to write!

Here’s the cover and blurb:

Kissing Her Scrooge, Holiday Novella, Holiday Romance, Romance Author, Kinley Cade, Author Kinley Cade, Winter, Wonderland, Loving Couple, Scrooge, Tree Farmer

KISSING HER SCROOGE BLURB

Every Christmas, Hannah Jones makes it her mission to give her hometown the perfect pageant. Even malfunctioning inflatable Santas and lost students can’t stop the self-proclaimed Miss Holiday. But the teacher may have met her mismatch in sexy but antisocial tree farmer Griff Green. Hannah’s been lusting after her new neighbor for months—and she’s determined to melt his heart by being naughty as well as nice…

He may sell trees, but Griff doesn’t do Christmas. He’s known as the town humbug—and he likes it that way. Which is why he’s been avoiding Hannah, despite the sexy visions of her that have been dancing through his head. When a surprise visit leads to a passionate kiss, he can’t deny the attraction any longer.

When Hannah discovers Griff isn’t the Scrooge he pretends to be—and she exposes his secret to the whole town—it may take a holiday miracle for their budding relationship to survive into the new year.

31,000 words

It’s part of the For My Own contemporary romance anthology. More information on the anthology is below!

***

And something that is not relative at all is the vampire mythology question of the day. If vampires are allergic to the sun, can’t they come out at twilight when the sun is gone but it’s not all the way dark? I never see that happen in books or movies. These are just random thoughts I think about while I’m walking my dog out at twilight when the sun is down but it’s not all the way dark. Lol.

***

KISSING HER SCROOGE EXCERPT

Wrestling with a gigantic inflatable Santa Claus was so not how Hannah wanted to start this holiday season. She jerked to the side, trying to place the display piece on his feet. Her elf slipper slid.

Bang. She slammed down on the icy pavement, full-on tangled with Claus. A hot, burning sensation sliced up her calf. The damn weapon jingled.

“Santa’s metal bells!” She twisted to examine her leg. Sure enough, her bright red tights were ripped up the seam. A trickle of blood stained her skin.

“Santa is plugged in and ready to rock,” her sister shouted from a distance, on the other side of the square.

“Nooo.” Before Hannah could get anything more out, Santa attacked. His big fist began to move toward his fake guitar in a strumming movement, which was more a sharp jab to her face. Rock n’ Roll Santa had been such a mistake.

“I’m your elf.” She ducked another one of his attempted chords. “JANEY.”

Janey scrambled over into sight. “What happened?”

“Turn the damn thing off.” This small city brawl was going to make the news. Or worse, the internet. She’d be infamous before the day was over. “Please hurry!”

“Shit.” Janey sprinted back toward the building a few hundred feet away, where they’d threaded electrical wires to power the display.

Mercifully, and probably thanks to a Christmas miracle, the Santa stopped trying to deck her. She shoved Santa away, revenge a steady beat in her blood. She fisted her hands, never before wanting to strike out against a little holiday cheer.

“If a kid sees you beating up Santa, you’re going to make them cry,” a male voice interjected. “Especially if it’s a student from your class.”

She whipped around. A huge man with broad shoulders and a familiar frown loomed over her. The guy she’d always thought of as Scrooge peered down at her, judging her.

Nice.

“He attacked first.” Pushing herself up, she stumbled when she tried to place weight on her injured leg. Pressure increased the pain. “Ouch.”

“You’re bleeding.” A warm body pressed against hers, propping her up. His woodsy scent invaded her senses. “Let me help you.”

“Thanks.” She had no glib comment for the attraction toward him she’d been fighting for months. She always had to go for the loners, even though they were the worst fit for someone people jokingly called Miss Holiday.

Usually, she didn’t mind the title. This year the season was revolting against her.

And then more stuff happens! 🙂 Click any of the buy links to find out what.

BUY LINKS

Carina Press ~ Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble ~ ARe ~ GoodReads

Here’s the anthology information. The two additional stories by Shari Mikels and Alison Packard are adorable.

Be sure to check out their websites. 😉

Kinley Cade, Kinley Baker, For My Own, Contemporary Romance, Contemporary Romance Anthology, Christmas

FOR MY OWN BLURB

Snowy days and steamy nights

This year, a modern-day Scrooge learns the true meaning of Christmas with the help of a suddenly sexy old friend. A down-on-his-luck baseball star finds a beautiful new beginning with a hometown girl. And a prim-and-proper teacher is determined to bring out the holiday spirit in a grumpy tree farmer. Settle in for the season with this collection of very merry short fiction.

Edited by Angela James, this anthology includes:

A Christmas for Carrie by Alison Packard Christmas Curveball by Shari Mikels Kissing Her Scrooge by Kinley Cade

Stories also available for purchase separately.

107,000 words

BUY LINKS

Carina Press ~ Amazon ~ Barnes & Noble ~ ARe ~ GoodReads

Three other lovely ladies are in a contemporary romance holiday anthology and we’re sharing a release day, so here’s the link to All I’m Asking For by Brighton Walsh, Kat Latham, and Christi Barth. Be sure to visit them, as well. I’ve had the pleasure of reading their previous work.

Most importantly, enjoy this holiday season with your friends and loved ones!

Kinley Cade/Kinley Baker